Guilty! Of inappropriate clothes in court

Silver vinyl dresses, ripped jeans, “wife-beaters” — great to wear to a nightclub perhaps, but not a courthouse. Yet all of these — and undoubtedly even more unusual and inappropriate clothes — have crossed courtroom thresholds in Baltimore and Baltimore County.

Blame it on the culture begat by dress-down Fridays. Blame it on lawyers who don’t tell their clients precisely what to wear. Blame it on jurors who don’t read or follow the dress guidelines on the jurisdictions’ Web sites.

“The respect level has gone down for clothes,” said Baltimore County Jury Commissioner Anita Grooms. “It’s not just young people, it’s everyone. Our whole society has gotten more casual.”

Appropriate courtroom attire, county style, doesn’t ask much of jurors: Don’t come clad in uniforms — unless they’re religious ones — shorts, tank tops, beach or athletic wear. Baltimore City’s don’ts are similar: “Law enforcement uniforms, shorts, Bermudas, muscle shirts, halter tops, and bare midriff clothing are not acceptable.”

Defendants and plaintiffs could benefit from the guidelines too. City Circuit Judge John M. Glynn marvels at men who wear sleeveless T-shirts (aka “wife-beaters”) to domestic violence hearings.

“I ask them, ‘Do you actually own an entire shirt?’” he said.

“Men,” he continued, “do things that are spectacularly inappropriate, whereas women do that that are stylistically strange. Some female judges feel very strongly that no male judge should say anything about what women wear. So unless women go overboard and show tremendous amounts of skin, I’m unqualified to remark.”

Eric Schloss, a partner with the Gordon Feinblatt law firm, has learned from experience that he is qualified to remark on feminine attire.

“In the county once, I told a woman client before trial, ‘Wear your best outfit, like you’re going to church,’” he recalled.

The client was late, so Schloss waited at the table facing the judge with his back to the courtroom entrance. Suddenly, he knew his client had arrived because all eyes were riveted by the person who’d walked through the doors.

“She had a silver vinyl dress on that was way too short,” Schloss said. “I guess if she was working on The Block it would have been appropriate. She had on silver high-heeled shoes, and she’d sprinkled silver in her hair. During the next break, I said, ‘What were you thinking?’

“‘You told me to wear my Sunday best,’” the client retorted.

“So now I don’t tell them to wear their Sunday best,” Schloss said. “I tell them they can’t wear jeans, T-shirts, shorts, sweatshirts and sweatpants. I tell every client even if they’re a CEO.”

So does Martina Evans, who specializes in real estate litigation and family practice in the city and county. And she learned to do so in a situation similar, if not as spectacular, as Schloss’. “I represented a young lady whose former boyfriend wanted custody of their son. He was in the military, so I knew he’d dress impeccably. I told her, ‘Just remember to dress like you’re going to church.’”

Evans’ client wore a short skirt and boots. “She didn’t see anything wrong with it,” Evans recalled. “And I learned to be more descriptive.”

Dressing properly for court conveys respect for the judicial system and for the gravity of the situation; after all, lives are in the balance. But it also can help you keep out of prison.

“If they dress like they’ll fit right in to jail, it’s easier to send them to jail,” said Glynn. “If they show up in a suit, you think, ‘I can’t send them to jail. My God, it will ruin their clothes.’”

Robin T. Reid is a freelance writer based in Baltimore.